Saturday, January 29, 2011's WORTH IT!

That pic was taken 5 1/2 years ago...Ty was 4 months old, Ben 6, Joe 4 and Sam Drumheller at the Dinosaur museum. WOW! Can't believe I actually had so many little ones all at ONCE! LOL!

So how does a woman in Canada raise 4 boys by herself for the most part? Thank her lucky stars! I mean really...look at what we have access to and am fortunate enough to have a decent income to pay for extras. Have been involved in the Peace movement for a number of years and can honestly say am grateful to be female in Canada. I can CHOOSE just about anything...I have a VOICE in my family...I have running water and HEAT...I have my private parts in ONE piece (although after 4 kids one can question you get my DARE I complain when most women in the world are traded or mamed or raped or in a position of powerlessness....NO influence as to their children's education, marriages...can't even go get tomatoes without a male escort......or have no access to food at all...or water....watching their children die of starvation...die from sold to sex traffickers...basically my worst fucking nightmare happens every day...9 million children die EVERY YEAR...all under the age of 5!

So don't ask me how I do it...I just DO! It ain't's all of my heart and soul into these boys. I gave up a very good career to be home and mentor they better turn out right! LOL! And they know that if they were born in Yemen that they would most likely be poor and hungry and will be educated by the "church" and learn to hate us Westerners.....

But to be BRUTALLY honest there are days I am such a BITCH! Have had enough of "MOM" "MOM"..."MOM".."MOM"...and the fighting! And the endless demands to make with'm so much smarter than this! LOL! The mess by "accident" is my favourite...hmmmm...sure! Being a MOM is HARD WORK! Especially in a culture where the expectation is ENORMOUS! I have to bake for 25 kids plus look polished and get junior 1 to hockey and junior 2 to baseball and junior 3 to karate and junior 4 to guitar lessons? All the while having a pristine clean house and gourmet meals on the table....are you KIDDING ME? So I shop for the gourmet meals when? We have such a crazy standard of living that we forget to stop and smell the roses...and in my world during the rain.... it's stop and smell the's INSANE!

At what point do we say ENOUGH! My kid will never be an olympic swimmer so maybe we should take Thursdays for family time? Have started that path in the last 6 months and we HIKE more together...we swim for FUN! We make muffins with egg shells and playdough in many colours...that does end up on my carpet but SO WHAT! Isn't the point of having kids is to ENJOY IT? Why are we racing to this and racing to thru meals that poison us the staple of the day?

MAKE a meal from scratch with the kids's entertainment without the will LOL and have a hell of a mess to clean up but it's fun! And family time! And maybe get them to eat something other than chicken nuggets...shudder....the smell of those things is disgusting!

Don't get me wrong...I have very high expectations for my kids and PUSH them! BUT...maybe I'm not the smartest person on the planet about what is best for them...maybe they know better....trying to LISTEN at this point...and be PRESENT! They are all growing up so fast....enjoy the small moments...create memories.....stay CONNECTED!

My Mom passed away 4 months ago...we grew up poor...but I never felt like I lacked because my Mom was so creative with her time and resources...and I reflect upon her and remember that childhood is SHORT! Childhood should be FUN! Childhood should create life long LOVE!

Take the time to build the means more than the lessons you paid for or the birthday party that rocked the will be the difference between TRUE love and BLIND ambition.

So we are 28/29 without retail therapy...and took 3 boys for a two hour hike in the pouring rain...Sam said "I LOVE the rain!"...that's my BOY!



  1. Well you have a lot of good reading here. I am proud of you girl. You are one of the strongest women I know. Don't know how you do it being alone in the thick of it most of the time. Faced with lots of challenges over the years you are an inspiration. I just started a Web Design course at UFV and let me tell you you have done this blog and impressed the pants off me. I have a lot of learning ahead. Everyone can learn something from this. Good Job!

  2. Thanks so much Maria...have no clue what I'm doing...just trying to be as open and honest as I can.