Monday, May 9, 2011

Body issues and why they SUCK!

NICE! The back fat hanging...LOL! I have been 125 lbs and 248 lbs...and either way I was SCREWED! I eat or I starve...I worry about it ...or I worry about it...EXHAUSTING! I'm fat and wish I were thinner but I sure as hell am not living off of cucumbers in vinegar ever again...and sure as hell not being so fat I had rolls on the back of my neck.....I think I broke the FAT quotient! LOL! Just fat enough to be considered fat but thin enough in the legs and arms to not be considered obese...LOL!  WOOHOO! Like any one should even CARE! What the hell is wrong with our society that women are SOOOO concerned with their bodies that they will permanently injure themselves to be thin or be obese? It's insane!  
Hello! It's our bodies and our minds and our CHOICE! I can hear it now...Susan is back on the choice bandwagon I am! You can starve yourself or exercise until uber thin or you can eat and eat until you need to sit in a chair to sleep or you will die...FOOD is a drug and the ONE thing we as Westerners can control...and do we EVER! J Lo looks so good....ummm...botox and the best trainers in the business! Even Victoria Secret models are photo shopped...I don't know about you but if they have to touch up the super model bikini model then I'm FUCKED! So why even bother? I hike...I play with my kids...I do the odd hubby loves kids love..well...most of the I think I hit the jackpot of balance in body issues....until I bought undies!

That's right..thinking I'm all secure and all that and will pick that package with that size and all is good...brought them home..washed them and put them on...HUGE UNDIES! My ass was floating in these they were falling down...I was pulling up...not a good picture of a middle aged woman pulling up her gaunch over and over...LOL! I guess I do have body issues and I see myself bigger than I am.....And I know where it comes from...

I was abused as a child and in my mind if I am bigger then I can defend's that SIMPLE! Have done the counselling thing and have come out the other side and know where this comes from....I didn't think I struggled still with the balance of past and now but I guess I still do...I mean's just panties! Hello?

So I will buy new ones and look at myself honestly in the mirror before I go....and to all of you out there struggling with body gets better! It gets to a point that you can laugh at yourself and know where it comes will never forget the hell as to WHY but you will get to a point as to SO WHAT! And tell WHAT where to go!.....

XXOO Big ASS pantie MOMMA love to you ALL!


  1. umm, dare I suggest that sizing of some products is way out of whack. What the label says and what the reality says are two different things :(
    Having said all that, I was wondering about what size you were .. because . . .there are a quite nice plain elastic waisted skirts at The Cottage Thrift and you could buy one, that was perhaps too large, and get a friend to gather the waist a bit, and it would be wearable for your summer Alberta visit. Sometimes a loose skirt is cooler than snug pants.

  2. I do it off and on all the time Polly....even as recently as the thrift store in February. Bought a fleece vest big enough for me full term pregnant and at the time thought it would just fit. One of those mind tricks that you deal with occasionally. I can laugh about it now! :)